


Infinity times infinity

by justapoet



Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Carlos Reyes Loves TK Strand, Declarations Of Love, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Soft Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Stars, Tarlos - Freeform, They are so in love, literally just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-27 12:54:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30123069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justapoet/pseuds/justapoet
Summary: For years, it lost its magic. Looking up was just useless and he was happy to avoid more questions without answers because those related to the Earth itself were already exhausting enough to keep him awake at night.And, then, TK happened.orCarlos loves stars, and he, somehow, found them inside of the most beautiful irises he's ever seen.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand
Comments: 21
Kudos: 121





	Infinity times infinity

**Author's Note:**

> That's my first time posting something here on AO3, and I'm quite lost and little bit nervous. Anyway, I really hope you like it, if you ever get to read it.
> 
> English is not my first language, so, please, forgive any mistakes.
> 
> The title is from "Sun" by Sleeping at Last.

There's something about the nights that makes Carlos's mind feel light and peaceful. Since he was a child, even more as a teenager, he'd sit on his parent's house's balcony and stare at the sky for hours until his father called him back in, so he wouldn't mess up his sleep schedule too much.

Yet, he'd spend most nights looking out his window thinking; about the stars and the most random things. He'd spend sleepless nights naming constellations and trying to remember the myth behind each one, explaining to his own shadow under the silver glow of the moon. His cellphone used to always have notes and pictures of planets and galaxies, his calendar always marking the nights and days when some astronomic event would happen so he could convince his mother to let him stay awake the whole night.

When he joined the police academy, though, he stopped thinking about it. Carlos didn't even notice when he stopped looking up, but somehow, when he did, it started to make his neck ache enough for him to give up soon. He didn't search for constellations or planets anymore and no longer knew when it would happen a meteor shower or a red moon, and his cellphone's gallery also didn't have pictures of anything related to space.

For years, it lost its magic. Looking up was just useless and he was happy to avoid more questions without answers because those related to the Earth itself were already exhausting enough to keep him awake at night.

And, then, TK happened. After years without looking up, there was TK Strand, who would drive him crazy and make him come up with more questions without a single answer and sometimes without even a question mark, making him doubt all of his steps and sentences. Then, all of a sudden, there was this beautiful firefighter with terrible luck, a gorgeous smile, and the most beautiful eyes Carlos has ever seen in his twenty-seven years of life.

TK happened and, somehow, looking up and forward didn't seem to ache anymore.

Oh, well; if being honest, TK happened, and looking down was way more painful when they were riding an ambulance with a bleeding wound on TK's abdomen and sirens blaring on the streets. Seeing the pain clouding those pretty eyes hurt way too much and, yet, he needed to ― someone needed to keep him awake.

"C'mon, babe; you have to keep your eyes open. You know the drill" Carlos said again, probably for the fifth time in five minutes. "Keep your beautiful eyes open for me, uh?"

"'ou like m'eyes?" TK grumbled. Carlos hummed in agreement. "Why?" his voice was low and full of pain, and he winced as Tommy touched close to the wound. Carlos squeezed the paramedic's hand in his, smiling quite embarrassed.

"There's this, uh... Planetary nebula, a young one. It's called Butterfly Nebula because of its wing-like appearance, a few more than three thousand light-years from us ― from Earth ―, on the Scorpio constellation" he started, shyly. His words caught TK's attention immediately, those big green eyes, even filled with pain, focused on Carlos' worried and beautiful face. Tommy, beside them, seemed to be curious, too, about where the conversation was going.

"It's one of the most complex planetary nebulas ever found, you know?" he asked, smiling little. "And the colors seem to change, too. Some pictures of it show us a dark nebula with points of light, some red, blue, and a lot of shades of orange" TK frowned, and Carlos could tell that this time, it wasn't because of the pain, but because he couldn't understand how it was related to his eyes. "My favorite thing about it is that it always, in every single picture, has shades of green light close to the center of it and on its edges"

Carlos chuckled a little when both Tommy and TK let out an "oh" with a sigh. He looked at their entangled hands before starting to speak again.

"I used to think that, if I looked through a telescope, as a kid, I'd be able to see it," he said, smiling nostalgically. "My father would tell me it was impossible and it would only give me an aching neck, and my mother would say that some things are just out of reach" he shrugged before looking up again, meeting those unfairly green eyes. "Turns out they were both wrong".

TK pressed his lips together, and Carlos could tell that there were new tears in his boyfriend's eyes in a second. The beeping sound around them went a little faster, and Tommy turned her head and smiled towards them both, focusing on Carlos for a second. He blushed, knowing that it was TK's heart racing for what he'd just said.

They got to the hospital minutes later, and Carlos was left in the same waiting room he always ended up in as they carried TK away to another surgery. He let a few tears fall before trying to breathe steadily again, his leg bouncing with anxiety brought by the uncertainty. No matter how many times he ended up there with the same questions and situations, he could never calm his heart and mind down until he had a concrete answer, and Carlos knew well enough that he wouldn't have it for a few hours.

When, hours later, they were all allowed to check up on TK ― the team had arrived after their shift ended ―, Carlos stood close to the window as his boyfriend drifted back to sleep. He looked up at the sky that night and counted constellations until a nurse came in to check the man's vitals. Then, he sat back at the bedside and took TK's hand in his, spending another sleepless night counting the dots on TK's arm.

From that day on, he'd find himself constantly looking up when the sunset on the horizon gave the sky away to the moon. He could tell TK was curious, slightly worried about Carlos' silence most nights, so the cop would just hold tight to him and kiss him slowly. TK didn't complain about that ― he could never ―, and he didn't ask either. Carlos mentally thanked him for that, otherwise, he wouldn't know what to tell his boyfriend.

It was nostalgic, now, to sit on his balcony and look up at the dark skies above him. It was a Friday night, both TK and him out of a twenty-four-hour shift, and it was silent and peaceful. Carlos sat on the ground, and his knees were brought close to his chest, his chin resting over his folded arms. 

He wasn't searching for anything specific, although his eyes could easily name one or two constellations immediately. It was late, already past midnight, and he couldn't tell how much time he spent in that position on the balcony.

At some moment, though, he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, and then a cup filled with a smoky liquid was put in front of his face. A second after his hands were around the cup, a warm body was next to his and big, bright eyes were staring at his profile. He smiled while looking at the sweet tea, the smell filling his lungs, and then looked back at the sky.

"Trying to find a nebula?" TK asked, his voice low and sweet. Carlos chuckled, shaking his head politely.

"Remembering my favorite stars," he said, and TK looked at him with curiosity, waiting for more explanation. "I used to love looking up at the sky and naming all the stars and constellations I could remember"

"Used to?" TK asked.

"I stopped looking up at some point in my life" Carlos shrugged. "Imagining any other worlds started to be painful".

TK didn't answer Carlos' words, processing them in a painful moment. He analyzed the man's face carefully, each edge and spot filling his heart with a fast, welcoming, and safe feeling, and each one of his words filling his chest with heaviness and some kind of gray cloud.

Slowly, he bent his head to the side so it was carefully placed on Carlos' shoulder. The cop took a sip of his tea, his head lightly leaning against TK's, his eyes still focused up at the stars as if he would miss something truly important if he ever stopped looking. TK found it adorable, one of his hands touching Carlos' arm and his fingers wrapping on his long-sleeve t-shirt.

"The butterfly nebula?" his voice was barely a whisper, and a tiny shy smile took over the latino's lips. "Do my eyes really remind you of it?"

Carlos nodded.

"That's probably the best compliment I've ever received in my entire life," TK said, the joke being said with a quite bitter truth behind it. "And what you've been searching for in the sky, now?" he asked once Carlos tangled their fingers together, kissing the back of the new yorker's hand.

"I'm not searching for anything," he said, slowly shaking his head. "Just wondering" concluded, and TK turned his head to place his chin on the cop's shoulder.

"What about?" questioned.

"About how... You know, we have more than we can count, on the Universe. More stars than we can put in numbers, more planets than we can put in names, and more mystery than we can put in theory" Carlos said, sighing. "There are more possibilities than we will ever imagine, and more life than we will ever be able to put among births and deaths. And, yet, here we are" he seemed lost in a trail of thoughts. "Putting time in clocks, names in stars and lives inside boxes. It's insane that, with everything we could discover, this tiny little space, this minimal planet... This tiny piece of _nothing_ drifting in the edge of the Universe is _everything_ we have"

He stopped, and TK absorbed the words calmly. It was something to think about, indeed, all of the things we praise so much being just a little thing, a grain of sand ― or maybe that's too much ― in the middle of something way bigger than we could ever imagine.

"And yet?" TK asked, knowing his boyfriend way too much to supposed he was finished with his thoughts. Carlos smiled gently, and TK felt the heart-melting feeling inside of his chest.

"And, yet, I wouldn’t trade it for _anything_ " Carlos stated, and TK could only admire him with a silly and loving smile.

Carlos squeezed TK's hand in his.

"So, I was just wondering about how, among uncountable stars, planets, stars, _nebulas_ ," he started, and TK smiled sweetly once again. "Among all of the possibilities inside and out of the way we see the Universe, among all the time in its totality; life, death, whatever time is," he said, still looking up. Then, his eyes went down and his face softened even more as his beautiful, dark, brown irises met TK's green, light ones. "How, on Earth and out of it, did I have luck enough to find you?"

In a second, TK lost his breath and ability to speak. His eyes widened a little, his chin no longer using Carlos' shoulder as support when his mouth just went open in incredulity with the weight those words had. He didn't even realize when tears gathered at the edges of his eyes, his heart insanely beating inside his ribcage with strength enough he could swear his ribs would break.

It didn't last more than five seconds, TK knew it, but for a moment it felt like forever. Carlos watched, a sweet smile taking over his lips and a purely joyful sparkle glimmering on his eyes as TK processed the words and, in seconds, threw himself against Carlos.

The cop laughed, his arms quickly wrapping TK's waist to pull him closer and his lips happily parting so TK could kiss him the way he wanted to. He felt something in his chest exploding, and he could only imagine that, whatever it was, it was just as bright as his boyfriend's smile between kisses.

Because Carlos could never imagine, as a child, that he would love someone the way he always heard love was. He couldn't convince himself that, somehow, among all things they could have, a feeling so pure and especial would be a possibility. Something so good, so unbelievably safe and warm could be his.

And, somehow, now TK was in his arms, kissing him breathlessly and caring, making him feel as if all the questions he ever made had an answer. They didn't, he knew it deep down, and he didn't really give it much importance as TK curled himself against Carlos, breathing deep as his nose went to the crook of the cop's neck.

"I love you," TK said. "The stars are witnesses to this" his voice was a low whisper against Carlos' skin, and he could only smile widely and hold TK close as they both looked back up at the skies.

"They'll forever be" Carlos answered, and he could tell TK was smiling.

There's something about the nights that makes Carlos's mind feel light and peaceful.

There's something about TK that makes Carlos feel infinite.


End file.
